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3208 - Keep talking. I always yawn when I'm interested.
3857 - Hey, how come even though you are still alive your parents are in mourning for you?
3240 - If I said anything to you that I should be sorry for, I'm glad.
1091 - We all spring from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.
2327 - A couplet short of a sonnet.
1313 - You were born because your mother didn't believe in abortion; now she believes in infanticide.
2866 - A 10K brain attached to a 9600 baud mouth.
1279 - You're so ugly if my dog looked like you, I'd shave its ass and teach it to walk backwards!
607 - You're so fat if you weighed five more pounds, you could get group insurance!
1825 - I bet your brain feels as good as new, seeing that you've never used it.
217 - You should have been born in the Dark Ages; you look terrible in the light.
1036 - People say that you are the perfect idiot. I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing alright.
2028 - I would say that you are barking up the wrong tree, but that is your natural voice.
3476 - Keep talking, someday you'll say something intelligent.
140 - It is only too easy to catch people's attention by doing something worse than anyone else has dared to do it before." If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents.