Treść
Can a hamburger marry a
hot dog?
Only if
they have a very frank relationship!
Losowe wpisy
- » Mrs Brown: Who was that at the door?
Veronica: A lady with a baby in a buggy.
Mrs Brown: Tell her to push off.
"
- » I was once in a play called
Breakfast In Bed.
Did you have a big role?
No, just toast and marmalade.
- » Doctor Doctor I keep thinking I'm a
caterpillar
Don't worry you'll soon change!
- » A young woman
took her troubles to a
psychiatrist. "Doctor, you must help me," she
pleaded. "It's
gotten so that every time I date a nice guy, I end up in
bed with him.
And then afterward, I feel guilty and depressed for a
week."
"I see," nodded the psychiatrist. "And you, no doubt, want me to
strengthen your will power and resolve in this matter."
"For
God's sake, NO!" exclaimed the woman. "I want you to fix it so
I won't
feel guilty and depressed afterward."
- » Me: "What is that noise?"
Customer: "Hey
Martinez!! I'm on the phone! Cut it out!"
Me: "What was that?"
Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep! Customer: "It's from a device."
Me: "What kind of device?"
Customer: "I don't know."
Me:
"Like a fax machine or something?"
Customer: "I don't know. Someone
is under house arrest or
something."
- » Knock Knock
Who's there !
Crock and
Dial !
Crock and Dial who ?
Crock and Dial Dundee !
- » A young wildlife biologist got fired from
his first real
wildlife job. Upon his return home, his parents asked
him what happened.
"You know what a crew boss is?" he asked.
"The one who stands around
and watches everyone else work."
"What's that got to do with it?" they asked.
"Well, he just got
jealous of me," the young biologist explained.
"Everyone thought I
was the crew boss."
- » What does an octopus wear on a cold
day?
A coat of arms!
- » A blonde
is walking down the street with
her blouse open, exposing one of her
breasts.
A nearby
policeman approaches her and remarks, "Ma'am, are you aware
that I could
cite you for indecent exposure?"
"Why, officer?" asks the
blonde.
"Because your blouse is open and your breast is
exposed."
"Oh my goodness," exclaims the blonde, "I left my baby on the
bus!"
- » How many lawyers does it take to grease a
combine?
Only one if you run him through slowly!
- » Q: How many Honor Guards does it take to
screw in a light bulb?
A: 22, one to screw it in, 21 to shoot the
bulb.
- » Who plays center forward for the vampire
football team?
The ghoulscorer.
- » A guy
walked into the doctor's surgery for
an appointment. "Would you like
to tell me your problem?" the
pretty blonde receptionist asked.
"I'll need the information for the
doctor." "It's rather embarrassing"
the guy stammered. "You see, I
have a very large and almost constant
erection." "Well, the doctor
is very busy today" the receptionist
cooed, "but maybe I can squeeze
you in."
- » What did the female mushroom say
about the
male mushroom?
"He's a real fun guy [fungi]."
- » What is a moo hoo for a sheepish steer?
A
woolly bully!