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There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Bearded Barbie ...complete with tweezers
Losowe wpisy
- » Q: What were the three toughest years in Al
Gore's life?
A: Grade six.
- » She's so ugly that when a wasp stings her it
shuts
its eyes.
- » Is it true the pigs went over
Niagara Falls in
a barrel?
No, that story's just a lot of hogwash.
- » What do you say to a
one legged
hitch-hiker?
Hop in.
- » A manager was being interviewed after he had
resigned from a football club?
"Were the crowd not behind you"
asked the reporter
"They were right behind me all right", said
the manager, "But I
managed to shake them off at the station!"
- » What do you call a man with a kilt over his
head ?
Scott !
- » Grandpa: You youngsters are soft and lazy
today. When I was your age I got up at six o'clock every morning and
walked five or six miles before breakfast. I used to think nothing
of it.
Fred: I don't blame you, Grandpa. I wouldn't think,much of
it
myself.
- » Can you spell jealousy with two
letters?
NV (envy).
- » Johnny comes back from school crying and says,
"Mommy all the kids in the school say I have a big head."
His mother replies, "No you don't Johnny. You have a hideously
deformed head. The other children are merely hiding the truth to protect
your
feelings."
- » What do you call an ugly rabbit that sits on
someone's
forehead?
Unsightly facial hare!
- » My Years in a Lunatic Asylum by I. M.
Nutty
- » There is a new Barbie doll on the market -
Joan of Arc
Barbie ...comes with stake, kindling, and matches
- » The Yuppie showered a Yuppette with gifts for
over a month. He
took her to fancy restaurants and expensive
resorts. Finally, he
proposed, "Bernie, if you will marry me, I have
enough money
to provide you with anything your little heart
desires."
"Sorry John." she replied. "I'm not ready to settle down
yet.
And besides, you can't buy my love, but if the price is right, I
might see my way clear to rent you some."
- » What's a pet's favorite
day?
...Saint Petrick's Day
- » Did
you hear about the two peanuts walking in
the woods?
One was "a-salted."