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Q: What goes VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH,VROOM, SCREECH? A: A blonde going through a flashing red light.

Losowe wpisy

» Why did the little pig try to join the Navy? He loved to sing, "Oinkers Aweight"
» Knock Knock Who's there ! Courtney Pine ! Courtney Pine who ? Courtney Pine tables, I need a new one !
» There are bats hanging of a branch upside down, all except one. Two bats comment: "What's happened to this one? - I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted.
» What's the most wicked thing a group of young accountants can do? Go into town and gang-audit someone.
» Knock Knock Who's there ! Auntie ! Auntie who ? Auntie glad to see me again !
» On his way out of church, Frank stopped at the door to speak to the minister. "Would it be right," he asked, "for a person to profit from the mistakes of another?" "Absolutely not!" replied the pastor. "In that case," said the young man, "I wonder if you'd consider returning the hundred dollars I paid you to marry my wife and me last July."
» How can you make a moth ball ? Hit it with a fly swatter.
» A man had been driving all night and by morning was still far from his destination. He decided to stop at the next city he came to, and park somewhere quiet so he could get an hour or two of sleep. As luck would have it, the quiet place he chose happened to be on one of the city's major jogging routes. No sooner had he settled back to snooze when there came a knocking on his window. He looked out and saw a jogger running in place. "Yes?" "Excuse me, sir," the jogger said, "do you have the time?" The man looked at the car clock and answered, "8:15". The jogger said thanks and left. The man settled back again, and was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window and another jogger. "Excuse me, sir, do you have the time?" "8:25!" The jogger said thanks and left. Now the man could see other joggers passing by and he knew it was only a matter of time before another o ne disturbed him. To avoid the problem, he got out a pen and paper and put a sign in his window saying, "I do not know the time!" Once again he settled back to sleep. He was just dozing off when there was another knock on the window. "Sir, sir? It's 8:45!."
» There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Chain Smoker Barbie ...with Surgeon General's warning on box
» It's not what you say, but the way you say it. On a blind date, the boy said to the girl: "Time stands still when I look into your eyes." The girl was very flattered. What the boy had really meant was, "You have a face that would stop a clock."
» Customer: What is this fly doing in my alphabet soup? Waiter: Probably learning to read.
» Why did Rudolfo salute the box of Cornflakes in the supermarket? Because the label said General Foods.
» The Pentagon once did a study on why so many American Servicemen marry women in the countries where they're stationed. Contrary to popular belief, loneliness had nothing to do with it. Once the men rotated back to the US, all their in-laws were thousands of miles away.
» Do buses and trains run on time? Usually, yes. No, they don't. Buses run on wheels and trains run on the tracks.
» Q: Did you hear about the 25 Irish people that drowned? A: They were riverdancing.