Treść
What do you call a black cat than can spring up to
a six foot wall ?
A good jumpurr !
Losowe wpisy
- » Why did the monster stop playing with his
brother?
He got tired of kicking him around.
- » As he was
drilling a batch of recruits,
the sergeant saw that one of them was
marching out of step. Walking
up next to the man as they marched, he said
sarcastically: "Do you
know they are all out of step except you?"
"What?" asked the
recruit innocently.
"I said -- they are all out of step except
you!" thundered the
sergeant.
The recruit replied, "Well, sarge,
you're in charge -- you tell
them!"
- » Q: Why do brunettes know so many
blonde
jokes?
A: Gives 'em something to do on Saturday night!
- » What's the
best way to increase the size of
your bank balance? Look at it through a
magnifying glass.
- » What is the pig's favorite musical instrument?
The piggalo (piccalo).
- » "Open wider."
requested the dentist, as he
began his examination of the patient. "Good God
!" he said
startled. "You've got the biggest cavity I've ever seen
- the biggest
cavity I've ever seen." "OK Doc !" replied the
patient. "I'm scared
enough without you saying something like that twice."
"I didn't !"
said the dentist. "That was the echo."
- » During camouflage training in Louisiana, a
private disguised as
a tree trunk had made a sudden move that was
spotted by a visiting
general.
"You simpleton!" the officer
barked. "Don't you know that by
jumping and yelling the way you did,
you could have endangered the lives of
the entire
company?"
"Yes sir," the solder answered apologetically. "But, if I may say
so, I did stand still when a flock of pigeons used me for target
practice. And I never moved a muscle when a large dog peed on my lower
branches. But When two squirrels ran up my pants leg and I heard the
bigger
say, "Let's eat one now and save the other until winter'
--- that did
it."
- » Q: What do you say to the banjo player in the
three
piece suit?
A: Will the defendant please rise.
- » yo mama so fat that when she puts on her
yellow rain coat and walks down the street people shout out cab!
- » The housewife answered a knock on the door
and found
a total stranger standing on the doorstep.
'Excuse me
for disturbing you, ma'am,' he said politely, ' but I
pass your
house every morning on my way to work, and I've noticed that
every
day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of
bread!'
'That's right.'
'Every day you wallop him on the head
with a loaf of bread, and yet
this morning you were hitting him
with a chocolate cake....?'
'Well, today is his birthday!'
- » Recently during the heavy rains they have experienced in
New
England the mail carrier for one neighborhood commeneted on the
"pouring
rain." Well , atleast the dew point is coming down!
- » What do you get if you cross a telephone
with a
night crawler?
Ringworm!
- » An Irishman went into a post office to see if
there were any
letters for him.
"I'll see, sir," said the
clerk.
"What is your name?"
"You're having me on now because I'm
Irish," said the Irishman.
"Won't you see the name on the
envelope?"
- » Did you hear about
the blonde who was an
M.D.--Mentally Deficient?
- » I wouldn't say Christmas gnomes are
small.
But they used to be lumberjacks on a mushroom farm!