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- » What did the hypnotist say when he got his own website.... Hyp, Hyp Hooray.
- » Who is the Gorillas' favourite playwright? Eugene O'Neill - who wrote 'The Hairy Ape!'
- » What does a Gorilla learn first in school? The Apey-cees!
- » I have a friend who is a pilot on a 747. I said "Hi Jack." He shot me.
- » Why aren't burgers too good at basketball? Too many turnovers!
- » Q: Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes? A: They're doing research on black holes.
- » How do you confuse an idiot? Give him two spades and ask him to take his pick.
- » What kind of book did Frankenstein's monster like to read? One with a cemetery plot.
- » How does Snoop Dogg keep his canine teeth white? BLEEEEEE-YATCH!
- » Why was the skeleton using the Internet? To bone up on his schoolwork.
- » An American tourist found himself in a sleepy country village, and asked one of the locals the age of the oldest inhabitant. "Well, sir," replied the villager, "we ain't got one now. He died last week."
- » How to predict weather in Seattle: If you can see Mt Ranier, it's going to rain. If not, it already is.
- » Q: Who has the right of way when four cars approach a four-way stop at the same time? A: The pick up truck with the gun rack and the bumper sticker saying, "Guns don't kill people. I do."
- » How do you measure a Villanova graduate's I.Q.? With a tire gauge.
- » Reporter: My editor sent me to do the burglary. Policeman: You're too late - it's already been done.