Treść
What's the difference between an American
student and
an English student ?
About 3000 miles !
Losowe wpisy
- » What is uglier than an aardvark?
Two
aardvarks!
- » Three weeks after her wedding
day,
Joanna called her minister. "Reverend," she wailed, "John and I
had
a DREADFUL fight!"
"Calm down, my child," said the minister, "it's
not half as bad as
you think it is. Every marriage has to have its
first fight!"
"I know, I know!" said Joanna, "but what am I going
to do with the
BODY?"
- » How do you get four old ladies to say the F
word?
Have the fifth one say.... BINGO!
- » Why do
cannibals make suitcases out of
people's heads?
Because they're headcases.
- » Who writes hit musicals on the
Internet?
Andrew Lloyd Webber.
- » Q: Why did the Jews wander in
the desert
for forty years?
A: Somebody dropped a shekel.
- » Do you think, Professor, that my
wife should
take up the piano as a career?
No, I think she should put down the
lid as a favor.
- » Sister: Mom wants you to come in
and help fix
dinner. Brother: Why? Is it broken?
- » Recently, Germany
conducted some scientific
exploration involving their best scientists. Core
drilling samples
of earth were taken to a depth of 50m and during the
core
examinations, small pieces of copper were discovered. After running
many
arduous tests on these samples, the German government announced
that
the ancient Germans 25,000 years ago had a nationwide telephone
network.
Naturally, the British government was not that easily
impressed. So
they ordered their own scientists to take their core
samples at a depth of
100m. From these samples, they found small pieces
of glass and soon
announced that the ancient Brits 35,000 years ago
already had a nationwide
optical fibre network.
Irish
scientists were outraged. So immediately after this announcement,
they
ordered their scientist to take samples at a depth of 200m but
found
absolutely nothing. They concluded that the ancient Irish 55,000
h
years ago were an even more advanced civilisation, as they
already had a
mobile telephone network in place.
- » You said it was a great horse and it is.
It
took twenty other horses to beat him!
- » What's it called when a vampire
kisses
you goodnight?
Necking.
- » Why couldn't the
bicycle stand up for
itself?
Because it was two-tyred.
- » Customer: Why is my hairline
receding?
Barber: It's not. Your scalp is advancing.
- » "Excuse me," a young fellow said to
an
older librarian, "I've just moved here and I wonder if this town
has
any criminal lawyers."
"Well," replied the librarian, "I have
lived here all my life and
all I can tell you is we are pretty sure we
do, but no one has been able
to prove it yet."
- » Why did the dog have a gleam in his
eye?
Someone bumped his elbow while he was brushing his teeth.