Treść
Why did King Kong join the army?
To learn
about gorilla warfare.
Losowe wpisy
- » Today I saw a baby who had put on five stone in
weight in
two weeks by drinking elephant's milk.
Whose baby was
it?
The elephant's!
- » What is a mouse's favorite record ?
'Please cheese me' !
- » What do you call a man with a rabbit up his
jumper ?
Warren !
- » What do cows usually
fly around in?
Helicowpters and Bulloons.
- » Manager: I thought I told you to lose weight.
What
happened to your three week diet ?
Player: I finished it in
three days !
- » How does a vampire get through life with
only one fang?
He has to grin and bare it.
- » What 8-letter word has one
letter in
it?
Envelope.
- » Barty and Dunny met in a pub
and discussed the illness
of a friend named Hogan.
"Poor
Micheal Hogan! Faith, I'm afraid he's goin' to die."
"Shure,
an' why would he be dyin'?" asked the other.
"Ah, he's gotten
so thin. You're thin enough, and I'm thin -- but
by my soul,
Micheal Hogan is thinner than both of us put
together."
- » What is a Mexican weather report?
Chilli
today, hot tamale.
- » Father Murphy walked
into a pub and said
to the first Marine he met, "Do you want to go to
heaven?" The
Marine said, "I do Father." The priest said, "Leave this
pub right
now!"
He then approached a second Marine. "Do you want to got to
heaven?"
"Certainly, Father," was the Marine's reply. "Then leave
this den of
Satan!" said the priest.
Father Murphy then
walked up to an old SgtMaj and asked, "Do you want
to go to heaven?" The
SgtMaj replied: "No, I don't Father."
The priest looked him
right in the eye and said, "You mean to tell me
that when you die you
don't want to go to heaven?"
The SgtMaj smiled, "Oh, when I
die! Why...yes Father. Shit, I thought
you were getting a working
party together to go right now!"
- » A man asked his wife, "What would you most
like for your birthday?"
She said, "I'd love to be ten
again."
On the morning of her birthday, he got her up bright and early
and they
went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park
- the Death
Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. She had a
go on every ride
there was.
She staggered out of the theme
park five hours later, her head reeling
and her stomach
turning.
Then off to a movie theater, popcorn, cola and sweets.
At
last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into
bed.
Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well, dear, what was it like being
ten again?"
One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually, honey,
I meant dress
size!"
- » yo mama so stupid it took her 2 hours to
watch 60 seconds.
- » Q: How many PA' does it take to screw in
a light bulb?
A: What's a light bulb?
- » Why did the dog say he was an
actor?
His
leg was in a cast.
- » What do you get from a cowmedian?
Cream of
Wit!