
Treść
A
married couple was in a terrible
accident where the woman's face was
severely burned.
The doctor
told the husband that they couldn't graft the skin from her
body,
so the husband offered to donate some of his own skin.
However,
the only skin on his body that the doctor found suitable would
have
to come from his rear end.
The husband and wife agreed that
they would tell no one about where the
skin came from, and requested
that the doctor also honor their secret.
After all, this was a very
delicate matter.
After the surgery was completed, everyone was
astounded at the woman's
new beauty. She looked more beautiful
than she ever had before! All her
friends and relatives just went on
and on about her youthful beauty!
One day, she was alone with
her husband, and she was overcome with
emotion at his sacrifice.
She said, "Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you d
id for
me. There is no way I could ever repay you."
"My
darling," he replied," think nothing of it. I get all the thanks
I
need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek."
Losowe wpisy
- » What does a pig use to write his term
papers
with?
Pen and Oink!
- » What's black and
white, black and
white, black and white?
A nun rolling down a hill.
- » One Day
Stupid, Trouble, and Shut Up were
driving along in their car when Trouble
suddenly hurled himself out
of the window.
Well, Stupid and Shut Up did not know what to do
so they went to the
police station. When they got there the chief
asked them their names.
"Shut Up", replied Shut
Up.
"Stupid", replied Stupid.
The police chief thought these people were
telling him to shut up, and
were calling him stupid. Which made him
very mad. "Excuse Me!"
shouted the chief.
Thinking the chief
was hard of hearing, They once again shouted there
names.
"Shut Up!"
"Stupid!"
The police chief was very riled. He
then asked" Are you looking for
trouble?"!!!
Stunned at the
idea of the chief knowing that they were looking for
their friend,
they replied,"Why yes, how did you know?"
- » What kind of money do snowmen use? Iced
lolly.
- » A policeman stops a car and suggests an
apparently drunken fellow to take a breath test. He blows, the thing
shows:
positive. He protests, cries he is a teetotaler and that the
instrument
isn't working properly. He says his wife is also a
teetotaler. She
blows- again positive. Then he gives it to their little kid
on the
backseat- also positive! The ashamed policeman lets them go.
They take off and
the man says to his wife:
- And you kept
telling me: don't give the kid any alcohol, don't give
the kid any
alcohol!!
- » What letters are not in the alphabet?
The
ones in the mail, of course!
- » An English
prisoner of war was held by
the Germans. The Englishman was shot all over
the place, and okay
until one day when the German told him,
"Englander,your arm is
infected with gangrene vee must cut it off."
The English prisoner
said, "Well, okay, but could you drop it over
England when you go
bombing?"
The German replied, "Ya, that vill not be a problem."
A few weeks later the German tells the Englishman that they have to
cut
his other arm off. The Englishman says, "Well, could drop it
over
England like you did last time?"
"Ya, that vill be done,"
says the German.
The next day the German tells him that they
have to cut his leg off.
Once again the Brit says, "Well, could you
do the same as before?"
The German replies, "Vhy, ya."
The next the German tells him they have to cut his other leg. "Well,"
begins the Brit, "could you just..."
The German snapped
, "No! We think you are trying to escape!"
- » My dog is a nuisance.
He chases everyone on
a bicycle.
What can I do?
Take his bike away.
- » Q: What's
black, white and read all over?
A: A newspaper.
- » First Kangaroo: What do you call it
when
giraffes moving one way get mixed up with giraffes moving another
way?
Second Kangaroo: A giraffic jam.
- » What do you call a pig who's been
arrested for dangerous driving
?
A road hog !
- » The last time I saw a face like
yours I
threw it a banana.
- » Q: Why did Moses wander in the desert for 40
years?
A: Even then men wouldn't ask for directions!
- » An old Indian lined up all of
his 10 little
Indian sons and stood in front of them.
He then asked, "Who push
port-a-potty over cliff?"
Nobody answered him.
He then
asked again, "Who push port-a-potty over cliff?"
Again nobody
answered.
The old Indian said, "I tell story of Georgie and Georgie
father.
Georgie chop down cherry tree. Georgie tell truth, Big
Georgie no punish."
So the Indian asked again,
"Who push
port-a-potty over cliff?"
To which the littlest Indian replied, "I push
port-a-potty over
cliff."
The old Indian then shakes and
spanks him, for his punishment. When he
is done, the little Indian
asks, "Georgie tell truth, Georgie no get
punish. I tell truth, I get
punished. Why you punish, father?"
The old Indian replied, "Big
Georgie not in cherry tree when it got
chopped down!!!"
- » What do you get when you cross Bambi with a
ghost?
Bamboo.