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- » "I'm giving a 'surprised' birthday party for you." "A 'surprised'. birthday party? What's that?" "That's where I invite a bunch of your friends, and if any of them come, I'll be surprised!"
- » What do you get if you cross a cow with a spaniel, a poodle, and a rooster? A cockerpoodlemoo!
- » A confused caller was having troubles printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said that it ''could not find the printer.'' The user had even tried turning the computer screen to face the printerbut his computer still could not 'see' the printer.
- » What did one of Frankenstein's ears say to the other? I didn't know we lived on the same block.
- » Did you hear about the rookie Rhode Island cop who gave out twenty-two parking tickets before he found out he was at a drive-in movie?
- » Did you hear about the pig who opened a pawn shop? He called it "Ham Hocks".
- » What do you have to know to be a real estate salesman? Lots.
- » What do you call a big white bear with a hole in his middle ? A polo bear !
- » What do you call a show full of lions ? The mane event !
- » Why can't the Philippines field an ice hockey team? The players all drowned in spring training.
- » What do you get if you cross a tiger with a kangeroo ? A stripey jumper !
- » Recently scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. To prove their theory, the scientists fed 100 men twelve bottles of beer each. The scientists observed that 100% of the male test group gained weight, talked excessively without making sense, became emotional, and couldn't drive. No further testing is planned.
- » Where do frogs keep their treasure ? In a croak of gold at the end of the rainbow !
- » Patient: Doc, what should I do with all the gold and silver in my mouth? Dentist: Don't smile in a bad neighborhood.
- » Strong Winds by Gail Force