Treść
Yo mama so poor when I saw her kicking a can
down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said
"Moving."
Losowe wpisy
- » Q: Why did the Jews wander in
the desert
for forty years?
A: Somebody dropped a shekel.
- » It was so hot today I saw
a robin picking
earthworms out of the ground with a pair of tongs.
- » Why did the rabbit have trouble
hopping?
Because he always kept one foot in his pocket for good luck!
- » The local courtroom was packed
as
testimony began in the
sentencing hearing of a woman convicted of murdering
her
husband of 20 years by poisoning his coffee.
The defense
attorney knew he had his work cut out for him
trying to make his
client appear more sympathetic to the
Judge, especially since she had
been so "matter-of-fact"
about the whole thing all during the
trial.
"Mrs. Roth," he began, "was there any point that
morning
where you felt pity for your husband ?"
"Well... yeah... I guess..."
she replied.
"And when was that?" pressed the
attorney.
"Well...," she replied, "when he asked for his third cup."
- » Girlfriend: Will you love me when I'm old and
fat and ugly?
Boyfriend: Of course I do !
- » What do tigers wear in bed ?
Stripey pyjamas
!
- » Q: Did you know that the three wise men
were firemen?
A: It says they came from afir (a fire, a far).
- » A waiter brings the
customer the steak he
ordered with his thumb over the meat.
"Are you crazy?" yelled the
customer, "with your hand on my steak?"
"What" answers the waiter, "You
want it to fall on the floor
again?"
- » Flo: Try some of my sponge cake.
Joe: It's a
bit tough.
Flo: That's strange. I only bought the sponge from the
chemist this
morning.
- » Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner
for lunch.
As they read the menu the waitress comes over and
askes Clinton,
"Are you ready to order?"
Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd
like a quickie."
"A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given
the current
situation of your personal life I don't think that is a
good idea.
I'll come back when you are ready to order from the
menu."
She walks away.
Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "It's
pronounced Quiche."
- » Democrat men like to watch football while
the women fix
holiday meals.
On this, Republicans are in full
agreement.
- » I was in the zoo last week.
Really? Which cage
were you in?
- » How did the aliens hurt the farmer?
They
trod on his corn.
- » A brunette walks into a bar and says, "Gimme an
M L."
The bartender says, "What's an M L?"
The
brunette says, "A Miller Light."
Another brunette walks in and
says, "Gimme a B L"
The bartender says, "What's a B L?"
She says, "Bud Light."
A dumb blonde walks in and says, "Gimme a
15."
The bartender says, "What's a fifteen?"
The
blonde says, "7&7, duh!"
- » Customer: How long must I wait
for that
turtle soup I ordered?
Waiter: Well, you know how slow turtles are.