Treść
Helpline? I've just pushed a
piece of
bacon into my disk drive!
Has the computer stopped working?
No, but
there's a lot of crackling.
Losowe wpisy
- » St. Peter and Satan were having an
argument one day about
baseball. Satan proposed a game to be played on
neutral grounds between a
select team from the heavenly host and
his own hand-picked boys. "Very
well," said the gatekeeper of Heaven.
"But you realize, I hope, that
we've got all the good players and
the best coaches." "I know, and
that's all right," Satan answered
unperturbed. "We've got all the
umpires."
- » What bit of fish doesn't make sense ?
The
piece of cod that passeth all understanding !
- » Dancing at the Party by Hans
Neesanboompsadaisy
- » What's the difference between Windows 95 and a
virus?
A virus does something.
- » Men are like
power tools.
They make a lot
of noise, but it's hard to get them to work.
- » What kind of money do polar bears use ?
Ice lolly !
- » What aftershave do monsters wear?
Brute.
- » Q: Why did the blonde want to
become a
veterinarian?
A: Because she loved children.
- » Why don't other bugs like earwigs ?
Because
they are always earwigging their conversations !
- » A golfer, playing a round
by himself, is
about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up
to him, and
yells, "Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really
amazing to
show you!"
The golfer, annoyed, says, "What is it?"
"It's a special golf ball," says the salesman. "You can never lose
it!"
"Whattaya mean," scoffs the golfer, "you can never lose it?
What if
you hit it into the water?"
"No problem," says the
salesman. "It floats, and it detects where
the shore is, and spins
towards it."
"Well, what if you hit it into the woods?"
"Easy," says the salesman. "It emits a beeping sound, and you can
find it with your eyes closed."
"Okay," says the golfer,
impressed. "But what if your round goes
late and it gets dark?"
"No problem, sir, this golf ball glows in the dark! I'm telling you,
you can never lose this golf ball!"
The golfer buys it at
once. "Just one question," he says to the
salesman. "Where did you
get it?"
"I found it."
- » What would happen if tarantulas were as big as
horses ?
If one bit you, you could ride it to hospital !
- » "Room Service? Can you send up a
towel?" "Please wait, someone
else is using it."
- » What do you call an alien surfing the
Internet?
e-t.
- » Do you like my new baby sister ?
The
stalk bought her.
Hmm, it looks as if the stalk dropped her on
her head.
- » What do you call an and with frogs legs ?
An
antphibian !