Treść
Why
did the computer act crazy?
It had
a screw loose.
Losowe wpisy
- » How did cows feel when the branding iron was
invented?
They were very impressed!
- » Teacher: What's this a
picture
of ?
Class: Don't know, Miss.
Teacher: It's a
kangaroo.
Class: What's a kangaroo, miss ?
Teacher: A kangaroo is a native of
Australia.
Smallest boy: Wow, my sister's married one of them
- » Why are chorus girls like barge horses?
They
have to tow the line!
- » Knock Knock
Who's there !
Bruce
!
Bruce who ?
I Bruce easily, don't hit me !
- » What do you get when you cross a bunny with a
spider?
A harenet.
- » Why couldn't
the skeleton pay his bus fare?
Because he was skint.
- » A young man who was also an avid golfer found
himself with a few hours to spare one afternoon. He figured if he
hurried
and played very fast, he could get in nine holes before he had
to head
home. Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman
shuffled onto
the tee and asked if he could accompany the young man as
he was golfing
alone. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old
gent to join him.
To his surprise the old man played fairly
quickly. He didn't hit the
ball far, but plodded along consistently
and didn't waste much time.
Finally, they reached the 9th fairway
and the young man found himself
with a tough shot. There was a large
pine tree right in front of his ball
- and directly between his
ball and the green.
After several minutes of debating how to hit
the shot the old man
finally said, "You know, when I was your age
I'd hit the ball right over
that tree."
With that chal
lenge placed before him, the youngster swung hard, hit
the ball
up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it thudded
back on
the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay.
The old
man offered one more comment, "Of course, when I was your age
that
pine tree was only three feet tall."
- » Why are bats blind?
Well, your eyesight
wouldn't be too good if you hung upside down all
day would it?
- » What happened when the
witch went for a job as
a TV presenter?
The producer said she had the perfect face for
radio.
- » Which big cat should
you never play cards with
?
A cheetah !
- » When do men insist that women are
illogical?
When a woman doesn't agree with them.
- » Q: Why didn't the blondes go to the movies on
one buck night?
A: They couldn't fit a deer into the
car.
- » The drunk was
floundering down the alley carrying a box with holes on the side. He bumped into
a friend who asked, "What do you have in there, pal?"
"A
mongoose."
"What for?"
"Well, you know how drunk I can get.
When I get drunk I see snakes,
and I'm scared to death of snakes.
That's why I got this mongoose, for
protection."
"But,"
the friend said, "you idiot! Those are imaginary snakes."
"That's okay," said the drunk, showing his friend the interior of
the
box, "So is the mongoose."
- » What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A
blonde parade!
- » A boy went to a Halloween party with a sheet
over his head.
"Are you here as a ghost?" asked his friends.
"No," he replied, "I'm an unmade bed."
Another boy wore a sheet
over his head.
"Are you an unmade bed?" asked his friends.
"No,
I'm an undercover agent," he replied.