
Treść
Why was Easter the aardvark's
favorite
holiday?
Because he liked aard-boiled eggs!
Losowe wpisy
- » Who was the most famous ant scientist ?
Albert
Antstein !
- » Democrats let
their kids open all the
gifts on Christmas Eve.
Republicans make their kids wait until
Christmas morning.
- » Doctor, doctor, people tell me I'm a
wheelbarrow.
Don't let people push you around.
- » Why did the moron give
the sleepy cow a
hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay!
- » What's a moo hoo for a darling bull?
A dear
steer!
- » Fresh out of business school, the young man
answered a want
ad for an accountant. Now he was being interviewed by
a very
nervous man who ran a small business that he had started
himself.
"I need someone with an accounting degree," the man said.
"But
mainly, I'm looking for someone to do my worrying for
me."
"Excuse me?" the accountant said.
"I worry about a lot of things," the
man said. "But I don't want to
have
to worry about money. Your
job will be to take all the money worries
off
my back."
"I
see," the accountant said. "And how much does the job pay?"
"I'll
start you at eighty thousand."
"Eighty thousand dollars!" the
accountant exclaimed. "How can such a
small business afford a sum like
that?"
"That," the owner said, "is your first worry."
- » Where do cows like to live? St. Moo-is.
- » Q: How
many Scorpios does it take to change
a lightbulb? A: None - they'd
rather sit in the dark.
- » Guest: Why did you offer me a piece
of
candy?
Hotel Clerk: You said you wanted the best suite in the
hotel.
- » What does an aardvark keep in his
aquarium?
An aard-shark!
- » I'm not going back to school ever again
Why
ever not?
The teacher doesn't know a thing, all she does is ask
questions!
- » Shortly after the birth
of their second
child, her husband offered to take her shopping for a
new dress. He
endured more than two hours of listening to her complaints
about which
figure flaw each dress accentuated. As she emerged from the
dressing room, having tried on the last selection, she asked for her
husband's opinion. By this time, he had learned just the right things to
say. "It's perfect!" he exclaimed. "It makes your waist look
smaller, your legs look longer and slenderizes your hips."
Just then,
a voice from the dressing room piped up. "If there's a
dress here
that will do all that- I'll take ten!"
- » The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for
all male students, so too
the male dormitory to the female
students. Anybody caught breaking this
rule will be fined $20 the first
time. Anybody caught breaking this
rule the second time will be fined
$60. Being caught a third time will
incur a hefty fine of $180. Are
there any questions?"
At this, a male student in the crowd
inquires, "Er... How much for a
season pass?"
- » What kind of ant can you colour with ?
A crayant
!
- » What do you get if you cross a bunch of
flowers
with a burglar ?
Robbery with violets !