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Srodek
Aardvark jokes
Who has a long nose, wears a mask, and sits tall in the saddle? The Lone Aardvark!
Podobne wpisy
Music jokes - A violist and a cellist were standing on a sinking ship together. "Help!" cried the cellist, "I can't swim!" "Don't worry," said the violist, "just fake it."
Dog jokes - What is the difference between a dog and a mailbox? If you don't know you must lose a lot of mail.
Biologist jokes - While driving down a steep and curvy logging road, a group of biologists loose control of their 4-wd "Jimmy" and careen down the hill. The truck piles up at the bottom of the canyon, and everyone aboard perishes. Suprisingly, they all go to heaven. At an orientation they are asked, "When you are in your casket and your friends and family are mourning about your death, what would you like to hear them say about you?" The first guy, a well known botanist says, "I would like to hear them say that I was one of the greatest botanists of my time, and left an eternal contribution to the botanical world." The second guy, an ornithologist, says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful birder and made a huge difference in the recovery of our bird populations." The last guy, a scruffy mammalogist, replies, "I would like to hear them say... 'LOOK, HE'S MOVING!!!' "
Funny jokes - 50 best jokes - A minister gave a talk to the Lions Club on sex. When he got home, he couldn't tell his wife that he had spoken about sex, so he said he had discussed horseback riding with the members. A few days later, she ran into some men at the shopping center and they complimented her on the speech her husband had made. She said, "Yes, I heard. I was surprised about the subject matter, as he's only tried it twice. The first time he got so sore he could hardly walk, and the second time he fell off."
Dog jokes - Q. What did the dog say when he sat on sand paper? A. "Rough rough".
Monster jokes - Mommy monster: Don't eat that uranium. Little monster: Why not? Mommy monster: You'll get atomic-ache.
Dirty jokes - A young teenaged girl was a prostitute and, for obvious reasons, kept it a secret from her grandma. One day, the police raided a brothel and arrested a group of prostitutes, including the young girl. The prostitutes were instructed to line up in a straight line on the sidewalk. Well, who should be walking in the neighborhood, but little old Grandma. The young girl was frantic. Sure enough, Grandma noticed her young granddaughter and asked curiously, "What are you lining up for, dear?" Not willing to let grandma in on her little secret, the young girl told her that some people were passing out free oranges and that she was lining up for some. "Mmm, sounds lovely," said Grandma. "I think I'll have some myself," she continued as she made her way to the back of the line. A police officer made his way down the line, questioning all of the prostitutes. When he got to Grandma, at the end of the line, he was bewildered. "But you're so old... how do you do it?" Grandma replied, "Oh, it's quite easy, sonny... I just remove my dentures and suck 'em dry!"
Easter jokes - How does the Easter Bunny paint all of those eggs? He hires Santa's elves during the off-season.
Farmer jokes - Camp Woodland was across the road from a dairy farm. One day the kids saw a large bull. 'Is that bull safe?' someone asked the farmer. 'Safer than you are!' was his answer.
Barbie doll jokes - There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Safari Barbie ...with rifle, pith helmet, and pygmy guide
Weather jokes - Two weathermen each broke an arm and a leg in an accident, and called from the hospital about the four casts.
Frog jokes - Why didn't the female frog lay eggs ? Because her husband spawned her affections !
School jokes - Teacher: I said to draw a cow eating some grass but you've only drawn the cow? Pupil: Yes, the cow ate all the grass!
Journalist jokes - Reporter: What made you go out on that dangerous pond ice and risk your life to save a friend? Boy Hero: I had to do it. He had my skates on.
Business jokes - 'I'm very sad to announce this morning, girls, that Miss Jones has decided to retire,' said the principal at morning assembly. ' Now we will all stand and sing this morning's hymn....now Thank We All Our God.'
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