Treść
Consider one of the most perplexing
questions of our time: Where do'
solutions go when a candidate gets
elected?
Losowe wpisy
- » What do you get if you cross a cow with a spaniel,
a poodle, and a rooster?
A cockerpoodlemoo!
- » Have you seen www.square.com?
No, I
haven't got around to it.
- » Q: What's the difference between a blonde and
a
computer?
A: You only have to punch information into a
computer once.
Q: What's the Blonde's cheer?
A: " I'm blonde, I'm
blonde, I'm B.L.O.N....ah, oh well.. I'm
blonde, I'm blonde, yea
yea yea..."
- » What dog wears contact lenses ?
A cock-eyed
spaniel !
- » Three women are
about to be executed.
One's a brunette, one's a redhead and one's a
blonde.
The
guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she
has
any last requests.
She says no and the executioner shouts,
''Ready! Aim!'' Suddenly
the brunette yells, ''EARTHQUAKE!!!''
Everyone is startled and throws
themselves on the ground while she
escapes.
The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner
asks if she
has any last requests. She say no and the executioner
shouts, ''Ready!
Aim!'' Suddenly the redhead yells,
''TORNADO!!!'' Everyone is
startled and looks around for cover while she
escapes.
By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard
brings her forward
and the executioner asks if she has any last
requests. She says no and
the executioner shouts, Ready! Aim!'' and the
blonde yells,
''FIRE!!!'''
- » Knock Knock
Who's there !
Alice
!
Alice who ?
Alice N. Tew if you'll listen to me !
- » What's wet and wiggly and says how do
you do sixteen
times?
Two octopuses shaking hands.
- » Mad men are given a test to prove they are
getting
normal their teacher draws a door on the wall and orders them to
go
out.
They tart fighting but one remains sitting and the
teacher goes to him
and asks why he didn't join others and he says
"let them fight they
forgot I have the keys"
- » What did one
keyboard say to the other
keyboard?
Sorry, you're not my type.
- » Miles Dobson was away from home on business
in another city. When he
called home, his wife told him, "Miles,
they had your name in the
obits
today."
"What! In the
obituary column! That's not only disgraceful but bad
journalism. I'll
sue 'em."
"Tell me, Miles," his wife asked tremulously,
"wh...wh...where are
you
calling from?"
- » Did you hear the one about the phoney Cupid?
He was totally bow-gus!
- » When the office photo-copies began to look
faint, the office manager called in a local repair service.
The friendly technician after inspecting the equipment, informed the
manager that the machine was in need of a good cleaning.
The
tech suggested that someone might try reading the operator's
manual
and perform the job themselves, since it would cost $100.00, if he
did the work.
Pleasantly surprised by his candor, the office
manager asks, "Does
your boss know you are discouraging business?"
"Actually, my boss demands we explain this to all our customers".
"After people try first to fix things themselves, we end-up making
much
more money on repairs"
- » What's a shy and retiring
accountant?
An accountant who is half a million shy and that's why he's
retiring.
- » Two friends: - I heard that you have
founded
a musical band.
- Yes, it is a quartet.
- How many are you?
-
We are three.
- Three?
- Me and my brother.
- You have a
brother?
- No, why do you ask?
- » Did you find my horse well
behaved?
Indeed, whenever we came to a fence he let me over first!