
Treść
What purrs along the road and leaves
holes in
the lawn?
A Moles Royce.
Losowe wpisy
- » So what exactly can I learn on the
Internet?
Anything you like - it can even teach you to talk like an
Indian.
How?
See? It's working already.
- » What do lightning bolts do when they
laugh?
-They crack up
- » What happened to the naughty little witch at
school?
She was ex-spelled.
- » What is the difference between a
bus driver
and a cold?
One knows the stops, the other stops the nose.
- » Teacher: How much is half of 8
Pupil: Up and
down or across ?
Teacher: What do you mean ?
Pupil: Well,up and
down makes a 3 or across the middle leaves a 0
- » A
system programmer came home from work
almost at dawn and told his wife
enthusiastically: "Tonight I have
installed a new release of MVS/ESA
together with VM/CMS and
CICS/VS".
"G.O.O.D" answered his wife.
- » What do you get if cross a frog with some mist ?
Kermit the Fog !
- » What do you get if you cross a dog with a frog
?
A dog that can lick you from the other side of the road!
- » Why couldn't the rabbit fly home for Easter?
He didn't have the hare fare.
- » What letter stands for the ocean?
The letter
C.
- » where does saddam hussein keep his c.d
collection?
In Iraq (a rack)
- » President
Clinton, returning from a
campaign stop in Arkansas, is climbing the steps to
board
Air Force
One. Under each arm he is carrying a souvenir of his trip --
a live
razorback. At
the top of the jetway, he is met by the guard, a
Marine sergeant, who
issues a crisp salute.
"I'd salute you back,
Sergeant," says the President, "but as you
can see, I've got my
hands
full."
"Yes, sir," replies the sergeant. "Very nice pigs,
sir. Very nice
pigs."
"Why, these aren't pigs," the President
responds. "These are
RAZORBACKS!"
"Yes, sir -- razorbacks. Sorry,
sir."
"Yup," Clinton continues. "Got this one for Chelsea, and this
one
for Hillary."
The sergeant replies: "Very good trade, sir --
very good trade."
- » Q: How
many retarded Italian gardeners does
it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: One, but don't expect
results.
- » Knock Knock
Who's there !
Ari
!
Ari who ?
Arin't you glad you use Dial !
- » A vampire bat came flapping in from a
night of foraging, covered in
fresh blood. He parked himself on the
cave's roof to get some sleep.
Soon all the other bats smelled the
blood and began hassling him about
where he got it. He told them to
shut up and let him get some sleep, but
they persisted until he
finally gave in. "OK, follow me." He flew out
of the cave with
hundreds of bats behind him. Down through a valley
they went, across a
river and into a forest of trees. Finally he slowed
down and all the
other bats excitedly milled around him. "Do you see
that tree over
there?" "YES, YES, YES!!" the bats all screamed in a
frenzy. "Well I
didn't!"